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Barbara and her husband brought their wedding forward because of her cancer treatment.

19th April 2023

DCCF steps in to help new mum after shocking diagnosis

A new mother from Dorset has told how The DCCF  helped her family when her suspected ‘breastfeeding problem’ turned out to be an aggressive form of breast cancer.

Barbara Jeffery, 31, was initially referred to the Poole Hospital Breast Screening Unit last August with what was thought to be a blocked milk duct. At that time, she was breastfeeding her daughter, who had left neonatal intensive care just six weeks before, after being born prematurely at 33 weeks.

Barbara said: “The duct was initially drained but was blocked again within 24 hours. It was drained four more times and then at the end of October, I had a biopsy on the liquid and one other breast area of “suspicion” which was under monitoring and swollen lymph nodes.

“Given the statistics of breast cancer and my age, I wasn’t overly concerned. However, I had a heightened awareness because of my family’s history of cancer. I have since learnt this is more common than I knew, especially during and after pregnancy, as the same hormones that grow and nurture a baby, also grow, and feed cancers. Yet, it is not discussed in any maternity care.

“On November 2, I returned for a follow-up appointment and was told I had breast cancer. I was also told I had to stop breastfeeding immediately.”

Barbara continued: “I had the children with me at the appointment, so it was difficult to digest a diagnosis that is associated with being a death sentence.

“I had my baby daughter on my lap and my son was struggling, so his dad stepped out the room with him when the news was broken to me.

“I was then sent for a PET-CT scan two days later and was informed it was Stage 3 and classed as ‘aggressive locally advanced’.”

She went on: “I was in a state of shock, but my children were my priority. The consultant said I needed to meet with the oncologist, but that I was likely looking at chemotherapy, surgery, and radiotherapy. I was taken away with one of the Breast Care Nurses whilst my fiancé at the time broke the news to my sister – I came out of the meeting and we just held each other in the corridor crying.”

In addition to their daughter, Barbara and her husband have a two-year-old son. He also had a challenging start to life after being born in a poor condition at 33 weeks’ gestation. He has delayed development and is neurodiverse, and is currently under the numerous departments at both Poole and Southampton Hospitals.

“Once we got home my thoughts turned to our wedding,” said Barbara.

“We had everything planned and booked for May 27th 2023 but I now had chemotherapy starting in a few weeks.

“I phoned Minster Bridal Boutique in Wimborne to see how quickly they could get my wedding dress and moved the wedding forward to the end of November.

“In the weeks following I was juggling scans, appointments, wedding dress fittings, hair trials, dental appointments and trying to get all the administrative tasks that come with a cancer diagnosis.”

Barbara heard about the Dorset Cancer Care Foundation (DCCF) from a leaflet the breast care nurses at Poole Hospital gave her.

She said: “The immediate and huge problem we were facing was how I would continue to care for the children during chemotherapy. My father passed away from cancer in 2018, my mum is a full-time SEN teacher, and my husband works full time.

“I had been told to switch to bottle feeding in preparation for the treatment. I was also worried about caring for my son and both of the children’s’ countless hospital and doctor appointments.”

Barbara applied to DCCF for a grant to help pay for a Special Educational Needs SEN nanny alongside other things to help during the transition between breastfeeding to bottle feeding, and then chemotherapy.

“The charity came back very quickly and said the grant had been approved. After two traumatic births and then the cancer diagnosis this was like having a huge weight lifted off my shoulders,” she said.

Barbara continued: “In the initial stages the nanny provided huge relief alongside my husband’s parents. But the DCCF grant went further than just helping with childcare. It helped with dog walking on treatment days and upkeep of the house, which would have been impossible with the side effects of the gruelling weekly chemotherapy regime I put was on due to the severity of my cancer. Some days I slept for 21 hours and could manage very little else.”

She added: “Ultimately the DCCF grant has allowed us the space to breathe through the chemotherapy treatment, which, in addition to the weekly infusion also involved nine blood transfusions, a magnesium transfusion, and seven trips to the oncology access unit for acute reasons and an inpatient stay.”

Barbara’s cancer journey is far from over. She has been identified as a BRAC1 cancer gene carrier and is now facing a double mastectomy, radiotherapy, continued immunotherapy and reconstructive surgery.

She said: “At this point we are unsure how we are going to make it through the next gruelling period of treatment, especially in the cost-of-living crisis. But the DCCF certainly made chemotherapy possible, and I will be forever grateful for that and to their supporters whose generosity has helped me so much.

“My family would never have been able to cope financially so far without the help of DCCF. I can’t thank them enough and once I am well enough will be trying to repay that help through some fundraising of my own.

“Prior to my cancer diagnosis, I had abseiled Table Mountain in Cape Town and Bungee Jumped Bloukrans Bridge in South Africa – so I am sure I can find a challenge to help pay it forward, so DCCF can help other families.”

An exhausted Barbara and her children partway through her gruelling cancer treatment

 

For more information on how DCCF can help you, or if you would like to become a fundraiser for the charity please visit: www.dccf.co.uk or email: hello@dccf.co.uk